I was walking through a store the other day when a simple painted sign stopped me in my tracks. It read, “Change is good….you go first.” I immediately picked it up to check the price, thinking, “I absolutely have to get this for my office.” It succinctly describes one of the biggest ongoing dilemmas I […]Read More The One Thing That Prevents Couples From Changing and the Question That Can Fix It
One of my favorite quotes is used in several variations and has been attributed to several sources, including Zig Ziglar. It captures inspiration for marital change: We cannot go back and start over, but we can begin now and make a new ending. Whose Marriages get Better? I can’t ever predict with any degree of […]Read More Change in Marriage: Learning From an Iconic Fail
I still had my eyes closed in a state of sleep one morning last month, when I felt a shift in the force field centimeters from my nose. My eyes flipped open to an image of my new granddaughter, beaming, in a sunny yellow dress. As I blinked, trying to make sense out of my […]Read More Adventures in Grandparenting: One of the Best Reasons to Avoid “Gray Divorce”
Love or Commitment? Researchers have confirmed that the single most important quality in keeping a marriage stable over the long-term is commitment. Commitment is an intention to maintain a relationship over time. In the words of commitment researcher, Dr. Scott Stanley, it is “We with a future.” People generally commit to someone in long-term relationships […]Read More The Main Aspects of Commitment in Marriage and Why it Matters More Than a Decade Ago
If my husband and I are out with another couple and there is a lull in the conversation, we can usually spark interest by bringing up the fact that we lived in a mortuary during the early years of our marriage. Back then, newlywed and college poor, we jumped on the opportunity to live in […]Read More If Money is Your Biggest Marital Problem, Money Might not be Your Biggest Marital Problem
Anyone considering marriage is trying to find the “right person.” Choosing a marriage partner is always a risk of probabilities, and marriage is experiential. You never know quite how it’s going to play out. I asked my husband the other day if he knew how much trouble I was going to be, would he want to […]Read More How do I Know if I’m Marrying the Right Person?
Occasionally, a movie is released that has enough universal impact that I hear about it repeatedly from my clients. So far in 2017, the movie is “La La Land,” starring Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone. Since its release, I have had many couples come in and report that the low point of their week was seeing […]Read More Flourishing in Blah Blah Land